Ship in a bottle conundrum

\Yesterday the hubs and I went in for one last ultrasound to see if all things were jake. The last time I went in, I was amazed at how big I was, at how formed the bun was, and how the hell this whole process was to commence. \ \ Now when the tech pours the conductive goo on the belly, there's a lot more real estate to look at and half the bottle of goo is gone. And the kid looks more abstract rather than less because the doppler can only look at little pieces of him because he's so big now. \ \ And when I say "big" I'm not exaggerating. They do all these measurements and then approximate his weight which, with seven weeks to go and a lot of fat-packing still to come, stands at 5 pounds (give or take a pound--making the measurement a great deal less than reliable). \ \ Five pounds. Let me put that into perspective for you. I was born at five pounds, 15 oz. two weeks late to a woman my size. My husband was convinced that 5 pounds seemed like a perfectly good number, but I was still shocked at how big he was, so we looked up fetal development for this week. Here's what it read:\

    By now, your baby probably weighs about 3 3/4 pounds and is about 16 1/2 inches long; no wonder it feels so crowded in there! ...Moms, you're gaining a pound a week now, and roughly half of that goes right to your baby. In fact, he gains a third to half of his birthweight during the next seven weeks, fattening up for survival outside the womb.

\ I'm sorry, WHAT? A third to half of his weight in the next seven weeks equals one mother-huge baby! Let's say he gains a third...okay, that's a 7 1/2 pounder. I'm good with that. Gain any more than that...I've got issues.\ \ My midwife asked me the other day how the childbirth class went, and I said that despite my concerns that I was not really up to the task at hand, the teacher seemed rather confident about all of us being able to do this. The midwife laughed and said, "It's like the story about the guy who builds a sailboat in his basement without planning on how to get it out once it's finished." \ \ That is exactly right. And the sailboat still has a third to half of his weight to put on. \ \ *sobs*\ \ (I will say this: the little bugger is cute, and while I'm a tad on the nervous side about the BIG BABY, I'm glad that he's not underweight, you know what I'm saying? So all things being equal, even though I do not feel like the job of baby-bearing is in the hands of a professional right now, 6 billion other humans being born before this one seems to lend credence to the idea that I may in fact be able to do it no matter what I think. \ \ I'm still waiting for them to develop the baby-transporter though.) \