This morning I dreamed that clowns were trying to kill me, a gigantic leather-clad robot was floating in front of my window in a search-and-destroy capacity, I was dancing in a miniskirt (this was perhaps …

I’m having a week. Not a bad week, just a challenging week. A week where I’m feeling a bit muddy between the ears. But the worst thing is that I’m feeling downright insecure. This is …

When I put him in his footie pajamas, he looks like Elvis in the jumpsuit Vegas years. Especially when the collar flips up.
I hope he doesn’t end up enjoying fried peanut butter sandwiches, or whatever …

Our little fellow has many animal guises:
The Chicken Man: His first animal incarnation, inspired by the position newborns find themselves in due to being squished into a ball for so long: a roasting chicken. It …

We’re celebrating by singing Aretha Franklin and David Bowie songs, anti-stress massages on the diaper table, naps on mom’s chest (an activity that I will sadly not be able to do much longer due to …

Women do not have a corner on the “getting baby dressed efficiently” market; oh no. Not at all.
In fact, of the two of us I’d have to admit that my husband is a hundred times …

…that the grins began in earnest on this day, Wednesday, February 25th, in the year of somebody’s lord, 2004.
He’s one smiley little guy.
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As I laid in bed this morning, groggily feeding this little person who has completely changed our lives, I was thinking about my poor boobs as usual. And then I realized he would be eating …

Okay, just as my disposition and discomfort led me to write about pregnancy less than reverently, so it might be for this whole breast thing. Yea, you know, the feeding of the tot.
You know all …

I bought a shirt that said “Open 24 Hours” on it, AND IT DOESN’T FIT! I’m so depressed.
That’s what you get when you try to race through a consignment store on your first solo outing …

First off, let me clarify: Frankenboobs still in effect, but now even larger with more veins.
Second: I don’t understand all the Janet hullaballoo. I have whipped out my boobs in plenty of unfortunate places …

I don’t remember who said it originally, but someone described taking care of a baby akin to taking care of a drunk. This couldn’t be more accurate. Signs of baby-alcoholism: blurred vision, inability to control …

Never, ever forget the diaper bag.
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Where does the time go? It seems like just yesterday that he was a brand new hatchling, and now he’s 21 (days)!\
We celebrated this great milestone by sharing a little wellspring of baby poop, followed …